Caught in the Fast Lane: Navigating Life's Accelerated Pace and Overcoming the Feeling of Being Behind

If my life were a car I would say I recently feel like I wrecked into a big cement wall (Kinda like I actually did with Colin's car in 2022 -- oops.)

I feel like prior to now I have always kinda lived life at a fast pace. At the age of 16 I was working two jobs, participating in softball and going to school. In the summer, I would work practically full-time because I felt like I needed to -- I think it's because I can never be inactive.

In August of 2019, I went away to college. I took classes full-time, worked 30+ hours a week, and played softball. After my second semester, I decided to graduate college early. (Hence, the accelerated lifestyle). I took full-time classes that summer, fall, winter, spring and so on until I graduated school in December of 2021... Accelerated, a four year degree in two and a half years while working my first (real) full-time job that I had started in August.

Graduating in December of 2021 and working full-time felt uncomfy. I didn't know what to do without school. So, January of 2022 I went back to school. I graduated with my M.S. in December of 2022..

In the span of 12 months, I got engaged, started a new job, was planning a wedding, and graduated from grad school. Accelerated. Everything was fast-paced.

But, even when I graduated from grad school I hadn't felt so uncomfy due to work being busy, wedding planning, and Colin getting ready to graduate college.

Once, we got married everything was still fast-paced. We got married, Colin went back to school, we were planning to move... Accelerated.

We moved into our house on June 17th, closed on the house on June 30th. I started a new job on July 3rd. Fast-Paced.

It is now January of 2024. I feel like we have acclimated to living in Georgia, we just got back from a vacation in Hawaii and life has finally SLOWED DOWN.. IT FEELS SO UNCOMFY.

I feel like I constantly have to go-go-go in order to feel "sane." I have felt so "bleh" because of it recently. Having free time and being able to just come home, relax and have nothing to worry about it so WEIRD.

I have spoken to Colin about it numerous times and told him, I feel like its my own fault in some way. I have always done everything at such an accelerated fast pace that I feel like now that life has actually slowed down I need something else to do. I feel like I am missing or forgetting something.

Colin and I sat down and had a nice chat tonight -- I worked hard for this. I worked hard to be able to relax and calm down. Not everything has to be accelerated. It is okay to be where I am right now. It is okay to be uncomfy.

It is time to get comfy with being uncomfy. (But, let's be honest I can never not be "go go go"..., so stay tuned to find out what I do next). LOL